Meditations for Queer Femmes – Dwell

This weekend, my butch husband and I had a most fulfilling moment of marital connection when we spontaneously went through our utensil drawer and rid ourselves of all forks and spoons and knives that were egregious in shape or heft. Almost all of the ones we weeded out we agreed on – it was so satisfying! “Wanna get married?” I asked her, and then, “oh, right, we already are!” And forks and knives are only one small reason that we made that decision.

Here we are where we live. Here we are in our bodies. Here we are with our things, spiritual, mental, physical; all the countless end points and beginning points of all the countless decisions we’ve made over time.

You elements, you delicious and luminous queer femmes with your wisdom and your creativity, your struggles and your efforts, stay centered where you dwell. Think about connection, to each other, to yourselves, to the on high and the deep center. Be there and be grounded for yourselves, whatever that may look like – you are allowed! you are called and held! – so your light and delight sings out to the rest of us. There you are. Here you are. With me, with each other, dwelling in sunshine, in rain, with birds, with insects, caregiving, receiving care, inside and outside and all over the world.

Here we are, here we are, in the new season.


Every Monday, I offer a Meditation for Queer Femmes in the spirit of my maternal grandmother, Mimi, who was fabulous, kind, and wise and from whom I inherited her Meditations for Women.

At the Total Femme, my intention is to post three times a week: Meditations for Queer Femmes on Monday, Pingy-Dingy Wednesday on Wednesday and Femme Friday on Friday. Rather than play catch-up in a stressful fashion on those weeks when life prevents posting, I have decided to just move gaily forward: if I miss a Monday, the next post will be on Wednesday, and so on. Thank you, little bottle of antibiotics for inspiring me in this! (“…if it’s almost time for the next dose, skip the missed dose and continue your regular dosing schedule. Don’t take a double dose to make up for a missed one.”) As I undergo treatment for breast cancer, however, I’m just going to post whenever I can manage.




Published in: on April 6, 2020 at 11:24 AM  Leave a Comment  
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